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So is it better for me to be successful and independent or is it more important for me to be in a relationship?

That’s the question.” Family therapist Heidi Henderson-Lewis said she would encourage black women like Riley to keep an open mind – especially here in Seattle.

Jones said she’s willing to wait – after all, she’s waited this long.

On a recent Thursday evening, Amalia Martino rushed from work to catch the last few minutes of her daughter Sophia’s soccer game.

On this Friday night, she’s meeting an ex-boyfriend from 14 years ago for dinner – he called her hours before from Los Angeles, saying he would be in Seattle around 7 p.m.

She has a type: “Dark skinned, tall, lean, like athletic-build black men. Not easy to find that type in Seattle – or to find one that isn’t timid, she said.

While you get special pre- and postconcert receptions for Benaroya concerts, the real fun is sharing pristine music in private settings—last season’s benefits featured principal cellist Joshua Roman raising the roof at Havana nightclub and violist Mara Gearman giving a recital at the top of the Columbia Tower. The male-to-female ratio in attendance varies according to topic. Not to mention he’s pretty nice to look at and I’m a sucker for an accent. I can honestly say I’ve tried my very best to be the best dancer I can be. Seattle has it all: We have the water and mountains, a downtown, and everything in between.

In 2002, Seattle Times columnist Jerry Large wrote about the black experience in Seattle in which black women complained about how few black men there were to date.

One woman said to "bring your own black men (or women) to date because Seattle is hard on black women's dating aspirations." More than a decade later, black women say that’s still the case.

In the last 40 years, black women have had a harder time finding black men to marry for various reasons – high mortality, high incarceration rates and interracial marriage.

For single black women, that may mean being willing to go out.

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